Blog - February 13, 2015
Its yours, love it
I was with some kids a while ago and through their conversation, I could decipher that two of them were very unhappy with their body sizes. They were bigger than the other kids in their playgroup. This caused them so much unhappiness as the other kids found every opportunity to tease them about it. One could barely contain her anger and she came to report her friends to me. I went all out for her and called them to order (hopefully). Hopefully because I knew that it could have been just temporary peace for her, as I would not always be there to ‘fight’ on her behalf.
This takes me to the topic for today. Why do people get bullied/bully people because of size? Fat, thin, big, skinny, plus sized, minus sized, thick, fleshless and all other names that human beings have tagged themselves over time? Why does a person’s physique have to be the basis for every judgement anyone would have about them? Why do some set of people draw out a design for how it is expected to look as a woman or man? Who sets these rules and why are these rules allowed to flourish?
These questions go through my mind from time to time and I haven’t found any satisfactory answer to them. From research, I have realized that there are different reasons for people to look how they look. The most important and unavoidable one being the genetic makeup. What a person consumes is also said to be very responsible for how big or small they would be but I beg to differ from this opinion as I eat a lot and I’m nowhere near the big side. So I’d rather go with the former reason, genetic make up.
So, this is the drill, if a person looks the way they do because their mum or dad or some grandmother probably looked like that, how is it their fault? Why should they be hounded about it? I go on social media to see different jokes being made out of so called ‘fat girls’ or girls ‘who have no flesh’ and I can never get to relate with that level of reasoning. I know It’s mostly jokes and people only feel they are being comic about this but many a times, people get hurt in the process and they take this banter to heart, why then should it not be stopped?
I have had to face so many people who find it amusing to pass ugly remarks about how they think I’m skinny or how I should eat up and grow ‘some flesh’. Sometimes, this is taken in good faith while at other times I just want to shove a stick up their noses to draw it away from my business. Like, why should my ‘skinniness’ be your problem? Did you ever pause to ask if I love it? Do you ever think that’s just how I am and there is little/ nothing I can do to change that?.
The above is very little compared to what some people face about ‘being fat’ as they are tagged. So many people even get ashamed to face the. World because they feel they are too fat. A friend once confided in me that she feels she has no spouse yet because she is too big and I spent a long time lecturing her on how she had to love her self wholly first before getting someone to love her. Do not quote me wrong, I’m not saying you can’t go through some diet or processes to reduce your weight if you want it so bad, but I do not support you thinking so low of yourself because the society tags you ‘fat’. Look at your body, love every bit of it, Only you can be that, Only you is that. Put on so much confidence and happiness just flows in by default. Whether skinny, fat, or whatever other name physiques are tagged, you are beautiful in your own very unique way. Wrap that statement inside a piece of paper, grind it well and swallow with water. ( lol jokes).
There is also the question of height. Short people are tagged ‘evil’ and some people blatantly declare that they would never be with anybody who isn’t tall. This level of discrimination is getting out of hands and it gives an uncomfortable feeling. It’s all jokes until someone actually loses out on an important person/job/activity because of his/her height or because the person has hounded others about it before. Everyone is allowed to have their specs as to who they want to roll with or who they want to befriend, but others that don’t fall under this category should not be disturbed just because!
Have you ever been bullied because of how big or small you are? What was your response? Do you ever wish to change your size? Why? Do you bully people? Why? Let’s discuss. BOS