Blog - November 10, 2022
Day 10: The November Happiness Challenge 2022
I was really eager to talk about this. You’d think I would get paid or something, but e get why. Beautiful communities excite me and I just can’t hide it. No matter your level or perspective to life, you need your own Community; which I’ll use interchangeably with Tribe in this write up.
No matter how much we berate the strategies our parents deployed to live life back in the day, the one thing which really stands out is how they were able to build different communities and how these communities in turn helped them to thrive. Starting from the Family units, our parents didn’t play with their associations. they had thrift communities who helped in sorting bills with a payment plan. There were social clubs who showed up and showed out for their own during events and when their member needed representation, the list goes on.
Even Parenting was more easily done because it truly took a village to raise a child. People didn’t really look the other way when it comes to kids, regardless of the existence of a biological relationship or not. Communal living was the order of the day and you could be sure to get a steaming bowl of Jollof rice if the neighbour three streets away was having an event. It was the normal thing to do.
Now, let’s talk about today. *inserts deep sigh*
How do we build viable communities when the order of the day is cutting people off and minding your business? Many of us don’t even say hello to the Neighbours next door, so how do we begin to expect Jollof or Small chops from one street away as was the order of the day? We derive pride and satisfaction in being aloof in the neighbourhoods we live in, and we don’t think there is a reason to even be cordial with people around us. How then do we begin to build communities or tribes?
I am here to tell you that Life cannot be done alone. You do not even have to be best friends or tribe members with every single person around you but it would be really nice to have a cordial relationship with them and know that you can approach each other for whatever if need be. This ‘western’lifestyle of minding your own and never mingling should be foreign to us, and we should remember that the advantages of communal living far outweigh the disadvantages.
Beyond the talk about our immediate environments (before I overflog it), it is imperative to state that you need to have your own people who you can run to, wine and dine with, echange ideas with and so much more. It could be just a group of four friends you have, or your School Alumni group, or your religious organization, et.c. There are numerous communities you could identify with for different reasons, and the great thing is that one doesn’t have to affect the other. These communities could be your safety net and more.
See, you need your own people o. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. People have created communities either physically or virtually where they build wealth, help themselves with important decisions and so on; why wouldn’t you want to be a part of that? What communities do is also remind you that you aren’t alone in whatever experience you might be going through, while providing succor.
I am a proud member of diferent communities, formally and informally and I wouldn’t trade them for anything. I know what I get from these tribes and they are my go to for a lot of things. I am not called a people person for nothing, I live the talk. One of such communities is the safe space I created for women called MAGWO Safe space and we have been going strong since 2018. We have our physical gatherings and the virtual one is unshaken. This community has opened my eyes to the importance of having women spaces where conversations are unbarred and people can share esperiences without the fear of judgement. This doesn’t mean that we condone misdoings or wrong activities; what we do instead is correct with love and hold one another’s hands in this journey of life. We learn everyday, and also unlearn harmful practises. We share business and career oriented idead and encourage collaborations. We are honest with oen another and also very soft when need be. The many testimonials from people who have been a part of this space cannot be ignored because they keep letting me know how they have grown in all ramifications due to being a part of the tribe. It is very fulfiling to see, fam.
I also am a part of a religious community and how we all encourage one another to be better worshippers is worthy of emulation. We are there dropping gems on how best to practise the religion, how to train our kids through the right path and many other corrections that we initially weren’t aware of.
Your community doesn’t have to be formally created or structured like the aforementioned one , and you probably even already have one that root for you and vice versa. Please hold them close and do your best to contribute your quota in making it thrive. I won’t stop saying it, we need ourselves and nobody is an island.
What does Community mean to you? Do you have a community? How have they helped you? Share with us.
I’ll be back.+